Darryl thinks he has never seen Mitchell before

spend all day watching holioakes, glastonbury, Michael Jackson and Wimbledon. get Darryl from his house and drive to Dawlish. can't find Dave Chappell jnr. anywhere so I offload Darryl with Alex England. Darryl is appauled at England's rude remarks towards his mother. I see my mother and Jemima. have tea and take Jemima for a gamble. take back Jemima and play football but England is shit. go to the Langstone and play table tennis untill we are asked to leave. drop everybody home and drive back to Exeter with Darryl where we drive around town trying to spy on uni students with full beam through the windows at Holland Hall. we put on Nirvana - You Know You're Right and scream it driving through town and nudge a dog-shit bin next to a park on Glasshouse Lane. drop-off Darryl drive back to Polsoe, take a piss on the street outside and have a ham sandwich.

have a bath and its nice in the morning. get Dazza and Dave, see Royston and Loveridge and go to Lydl. get lost trying to find Spitchwick and go to a information point on the moor, where a litty tells me the directions to the carpark quite efficiently. Dave screams horribly at everybody we drive past, the gentry of Widecombe with their ice creams are particularly offended. the road has grit which shoots us through the window because I dont give a fuck about 20 mile per hour warning signs.

at Spitchwick we go the wrong way and have to turn around to find the cliff. Acres and that lot arent there, but there stuff is so we sit and pretend they are with us. when they get back we talk about Alan Haskey for a while and then jump off the cliff. Acres is a mentalist and does a backflip from the normal spot, then procedes to climb up a tree twice as high as the cliff and stands on the log bouncing like the gibbon olympics and hurls himself out of the branch into the water. then he leaves, taking Mabin, Stefan and Kate with him but leaving Laney with us. we skim stones in the river for a while and perve on all the girls and mums in bikini's for a while.

go back to Dawish play badminton, eat pasta and egg at mine with canneloni beans. Jemima shows me a fish upstairs and I go back to Dave's where we all squish into his room and watch Andy Murray, even though none of us are Scottish. go to Langstone for more table tennis where Darryl whacks out the frying pan to beat Dave. earlier on in the evening he 'luckily beat me' at badminton too. England doesnt wanna go home, so we dont take him for a while, then we do anyway so it doesnt matter. drive to Tesco and buy some food, bark at a girl in he carpark and we all look stupid; I have a sleeveless top and board shorts on, Darryl has shorts and t-shirt but no shoes, Dave has trackies on and Acres is in a suit. Darryl gets escorted out by me, because the manager doesnt like his bare feet. eat food. drive back. get in my car. red-light petrol. drive back anyway. drop Dazza off. piss on his neighbour's garden. drive back to Polsoe. drink a water. listen to Deathcab because I'm feeling gay. sleep